A Helper

I now have a "helper" who stays at my house 3 days a week. This eases David's mind but I am still so-so on the whole idea. I have never had help with anything, the house is my responsibility to clean, my children are mine to take care of. But right now the doctor wants me to rest as much as possible, and is the one who suggested we get some help around here. I hate the feeling of not being able to do these normal things on my own right now. It makes me feel useless.

Don't get me wrong, the help is great. My house is so clean on the days she is here, helping David as much as me in that area. Before, poor overworked David was working his fulltime job only to come home, cook dinner and clean up the house. I would do what cleaning I could, yet it wasn't near what I was able to do before becoming pregnant with the triplets.

The downside to all this... yes, always a downside. My 21 month old baby girl Peyton is in her shy stage. She only wants Mommy or Daddy, and when helper is here she screams whenever she comes near her. Helper tried to fill Peyton's sippy cup and my little drama queen had an all out meltdown! She clings to me, clawing her way onto my lap whenever helper is around. This is more of a burden than help. But what to do about it? She does a lot around the house, tells me to sit everytime I get up, and is great with Baylee. Peyton is my only issue. I am hoping she relaxes and realizes that helper is our friend and warms up to her.

All this brings me to the issue of my upcoming (1st ever!) c-section. We have no family around to count on and leave the kids with, and friends all have families and children of their own. We would prefer someone to be here at the house with the kids to make it easy for them, and for them to be able to sleep in their own beds. Right now I told David that we will find a sitter during the day and he can come home with them at night. This still worries him, because he is worried if something should happen to me at the hospital while he is away. I would miss him of course, but the kids need him more than I do. I just need him there for the hard part... the surgery. Still thinking this all over, still worried, still scared.

Doctor appointments tomorrow, perinatologist and level 2 ultrasound with babies measurements. Hoping all is well as I have been horribly sick with an awful cold for 6 days now.

Random Update

Tomorrow is another appointment with the Perinatologist, with level 2 ultrasound then rushing over to the OBs office for a regular appointment. I am 21 weeks pregnant today.

Over the weekend we went to The Woodlands, TX. We were spending the weekend at The Woodlands Resort (very beautiful!) but the gorgeous weather we had the weekend before vanished and it was cold and rainy. So that Saturday we went to The Woodlands Mall to walk around and be out and about. All in all it was a pretty good day, got some new much needed shoes that make walking so much easier! That night my 5 year old son ended up throwing up all over the hotel room bed and floor. We decided it would be best to leave a day early and get him home.

Sunday we went to get a few things at the store, but I just was not feeling right. My belly was pulling, my back was hurting and I opted to go home. Of course mentioning that I was in pain upset David and he kept me on the couch the rest of the day. Once the youngest (21 months) was put down for her nap and the two middle children occupied with a movie, he took off to get groceries with the oldest. I felt awful that doing something as simple as getting groceries for two weeks is now a chore that can't always be accomplished by me, or with me tagging along.

For the rest of the day Sunday I was in a lot of pain, my belly would tighten to the point I couldn't breathe. It didn't really feel like contractions since I know what those feel like so I chalked it up to more stretching. Will obviously be talking to the doctors about this tomorrow and make sure all is well. It hurt to get up off the couch for any reason, and was in tears just getting up to use the bathroom and return to the couch. Not fun! Carrying three babies has definately been interesting to say the least. More updates after the appointments tomorrow...

Resting

At yesterdays Perinatologist appointment the doctor saw and pointed out an old bleed inside. She said at this point, its not bleeding and is okay but its like a bruise would be. The placenta is attached, but has pulled slightly from that area as the bruise will not allow it to attach there. In her words I need rest and to stop being super mom. Not so easy, but I will do my best.

Tonight I found myself getting easily frustrated at the slightest of things which quickly turned from frustration to crying over nothing. Fun, right? My poor husband. He is such a good man. Since I already had dinner started for the kids (I was in another not wanting to eat mood), he sent me upstairs to rest in bed. He evem set up a computer up here so along with a tv, I am all set.

Its hard to eat lately. I can't force myself to eat. If something doesn't look good, or I don't have an appetite I just can't eat. David doesn't like that answer though. Tonight I was content having water and canteloupe for dinner. That didn't satisfy him. So here I sit with a plate of tacos in front of me that smell delicious and I am hesitating. I have got to eat, I know that. It's just not easy right now. Aside from not wanting things, or just looking at something and it making me gag, the babies are pushing on my belly making me full with just a few bites down. The triplets are all great weights, and all their stats look great so I don't see the big deal. Guess I will just have to keep those protein drinks on hand if this continues. Those really aren't so bad and are easier than eating half the time.

I'm healthy, and they are healthy and that's what matters right now. I will rest as much as anyone tells me to so that I can avoid bedrest for as long as possible.

Growing Belly

This is to keep track of the growing belly. I should have started sooner, but oh well :)

Here I am at 5 months, 17 weeks, taken yesterday 2/23/2010

2nd picture is the first I took, at 4 months

How this all started...

I bet a lot of you are wondering what went through my head to become a surrogate. Well... lots, really. Infertility is something that is very close to me (because of people who are close to me who unfortunately suffer from it), and I like to help when I can. My husband and I have four wonderful children together, and the more I looked at them, I knew I wanted to try to give that gift to a couple who couldn't conceive.

In the begining I wasn't quite sure where to start, and spent many hours (yay for nap time!) searching google for surrogacy related articles. I found a local Houston surrogacy agency and wrote to them for more information. They asked that I fill out their forms to request information, and then without sending any, denied me for weight. Really? All I wanted was information. Sure, I was still a bit overweight from having my 4th child just a few months earlier, and it sent a blow and bad feeling. Discouraged, I walked away from the idea for a few months.

The desire to help just never went away, and I returned to my search. I found a new agency that was more than willing to provide information and talk with me about the process. Extraordinary Conceptions, based in Southern California, is the agency I chose to work with. They staff friendly people and are easy to work with. The paperwork was easy to fill out, as well as the applications and soon enough I found myself as a searchable surrogate on their website. It took only 4 months to be matched with the Intended Parents I am now carrying triplets for.

Everything just seemed meant to be from the start of meeting them. I really don't know another way to put it. I've always believed everything happens for a reason, and we were brought together for a reason.

The screening process, matching process, medications, injections, many invasive ultrasounds to measure how things were coming along finally brought us to San Diego, California for the transfer in mid November. The doctor transferred two healthy looking 5 day old embryos and sent me home for 3 days strict bedrest. No walking around, no getting up, no showering, no bending, nothing other than getting up to use the bathroom for three whole days. It felt like an eternity and I was so grateful for that warm shower on the third day!

Back down to San Diego the day I was let off bedrest for bloodwork and to spend the day down at the beach before having to return home to Houston. (Side Note: Southern California is my home... where I was raised, Houston, is temporary haha).

I knew I was pregnant right away. I craved spicy and meat and had to have Mexican food. Gladly my husband indulged and we ate Colimas in Oceanside twice on that visit - best carne asada burritos on earth, hands down! I drank spicy V8 juice as a treat and savored it. Still, we had to wait until a doctors blood test a few weeks later to determine if the pregnancy was successful.

At home I was nauseaus, tired and just knew. The 1st beta had numbers in the 6,000's to which the doctors were happy and suspected both embryos took. My 2nd beta doubled just as they wanted. The IPs were on Cloud 9. I was beyond thrilled to have sucessfully gotten pregnant on the first attempt. Still, more injections followed. Two shots in the rear on Mondays and Thursdays, every other day was a single shot, along with all the pill form medication. The shots lasted through the entire first trimester and let me tell you it wasn't easy. There were days when I was so sick and ready to throw up I didn't even want to stand up, but knew it had to be done.

Seven weeks pregnant the IPs, myself, and my two youngest children went to the OB to see how things were going. After the initial appointment they decided to do an ultrasound to see how many babies we had. First shot showed two sacs and two babies... fraternal twins! Oh wait... what's that?? One sac had two babies in it! Identical twins! So that day I found myself not pregnant with one or two... but three babies! You should have seen the tears of joy in that room!