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Friday, April 9, 2010

Week 23 Dr visit & random updates

I've been horribly sick for 7 days as of this past Tuesday, the day of my doctors appointments. Helper was dropped off early to care for the two toddler girls and see the two school aged ones off to the bus. Poor helper, I felt so bad for her as she was obviously sick and coming down with what I had. On top of that Peyton (youngest) still hasn't warmed up to her and I was so worried she would do nothing but scream and cry the entire time we were gone. It helped that my oldest Caitlyn occupied Peyton as we left, and as we heard later, when the big kids left for school she wasn't screaming. Still, I worried that entire morning.

First stop was the hospital (where they now know me by name haha) for the level 2 ultrasound with the Maternal Fetal Medicine Clinic and the short visit from the perinatologist. This scan was a full anatomy scan and measurements, so it took nearly 2 hours to complete. I was in so much pain laying there on that hard hospital gurney! The ultrasound tech tried helping by giving me a pillow to prop my hip this way or that way to get in a semicomfortable position but eventually I just gave up and hoped the time would fly by.

All three babies look wonderful, their fluids are still perfect and they still (somehow) have room enough to keep changing positions. Triplet A is the lowest, she is the only girl, was laying head down and measured perfect weighing in at 1lb5oz. Triplet B started out laying head down, then moved back into his breech position which gave the tech a bit of a hard time trying to get him back in the right position for the scan. He measured great as well and weighed in at 1lb6oz. Triplet C is laying transverse across my belly which is quite painful when he stretches since there are two other little ones in the cramped space. His measurements were also right on target and this scan he weighed the most just a few ounces above his brother and sister at 1lb8oz.

Once the Perinatologist reviewed the scans and said everything was perfect we were on our way headed upstairs in the connecting building to my OBs office. For the first time ever it was only a 10 minute wait to see the OB which was shocking. Blood pressure was normal as per the nurse and even though the babies had gained weight, I somehow lost a pound when I was weighed. I'm still not quite sure how that all works out, but the doctor said it is fairly normal with multiple pregnancies. David assured everyone I was eating as well as taking all of my vitamins, and for once he wasn't on my case for losing weight. Shock of the day number two, haha. The doctor was pleased with how everything was going, didn't have any concerns, and gave me another antibiotic for my upper respiratory infection.

Finally at home all I wanted to do was sleep but helper was here and for some reason I just don't feel comfortable going to bed when someone is here. We fed the girls some lunch and as Peyton was getting cranky I knew I needed to lay down as well. If helper wasn't here I would have put on a movie and layed in my bed with Baylee while Peyton took a nap in her own bed, but Baylee refuses naps when helper is here. I gave in and ended up falling asleep for an hour while Peyton napped, which was much needed.

As the week went on helper was sounding worse and worse, I knew she needed to rest and see her own doctor, but she kept telling me she was fine and didn't need anything. I just couldn't help but feel bad for her. Still, she cleaned the house for me while I felt like I was going to cough up a lung on the couch. I am so grateful for the cleaning she has done. Still, I was a bit irked at one thing I need to talk to her about. My maternity clothes. I wash my shirts in a gentle cycle then hang them to dry so they won't shrink. Some are already getting short on my ever protruding belly and I want them to last as long as possible. To keep them seperate from the rest of the laundry I keep them in a pile on my closet floor until the week is over (and I've run out of shirts to wear) and then I wash them. Well, helper went in and grabbed them without me knowing, washed and dried them along with the rest of the laundry and now I have 3 shirts that now show the bottom of my belly. I was so upset by this (when pregnant the smallest things seem like the biggest) but knew she didn't realize what had been done. So, yes, I need to talk to her so it doesn't happen to the rest of my shirts. It's not like I can afford or want to go out and buy a handful of new maternity clothes when I am not sure if I will ever be pregnant again after this pregnancy.

This week was a bit stressful as we had to take the van into the shop. It's the only vehicle we have that fits my family of 6, and when something is wrong with it, it ends up being really stressful. For two days it stayed in the shop getting the repairs it needed and I was sick looking at the bill. Times like that I am thankful for the check I get being a surrogate. Without it, we never would have been able to pay for the van to be fixed. As it is, David's paychecks have been short because he works only a half day every other Tuesday to take me to my doctor appointments and that comes out of his checks.

Anyway, stresses are at a minimum today. I am home alone with the girls, and we are still lounging around in our pajamas at 9am. We are going to color, watch cartoons and just veg all day long. I haven't been sleeping well yet again, and the cold doesn't help things, so I am also looking forward to a nap with them today!

Monday, April 5, 2010

A Helper

I now have a "helper" who stays at my house 3 days a week. This eases David's mind but I am still so-so on the whole idea. I have never had help with anything, the house is my responsibility to clean, my children are mine to take care of. But right now the doctor wants me to rest as much as possible, and is the one who suggested we get some help around here. I hate the feeling of not being able to do these normal things on my own right now. It makes me feel useless.

Don't get me wrong, the help is great. My house is so clean on the days she is here, helping David as much as me in that area. Before, poor overworked David was working his fulltime job only to come home, cook dinner and clean up the house. I would do what cleaning I could, yet it wasn't near what I was able to do before becoming pregnant with the triplets.

The downside to all this... yes, always a downside. My 21 month old baby girl Peyton is in her shy stage. She only wants Mommy or Daddy, and when helper is here she screams whenever she comes near her. Helper tried to fill Peyton's sippy cup and my little drama queen had an all out meltdown! She clings to me, clawing her way onto my lap whenever helper is around. This is more of a burden than help. But what to do about it? She does a lot around the house, tells me to sit everytime I get up, and is great with Baylee. Peyton is my only issue. I am hoping she relaxes and realizes that helper is our friend and warms up to her.

All this brings me to the issue of my upcoming (1st ever!) c-section. We have no family around to count on and leave the kids with, and friends all have families and children of their own. We would prefer someone to be here at the house with the kids to make it easy for them, and for them to be able to sleep in their own beds. Right now I told David that we will find a sitter during the day and he can come home with them at night. This still worries him, because he is worried if something should happen to me at the hospital while he is away. I would miss him of course, but the kids need him more than I do. I just need him there for the hard part... the surgery. Still thinking this all over, still worried, still scared.

Doctor appointments tomorrow, perinatologist and level 2 ultrasound with babies measurements. Hoping all is well as I have been horribly sick with an awful cold for 6 days now.

Wednesday, March 24, 2010

Dr visit week 21

Every other Tuesday is a morning full of doctors appointments for me and the triplets. This was our 21 week appointment and fluid check on the babies. It was the quickest appointment with the Perinatologist, level 2 ultrasound scan that we have ever had, and according to them everything looks great. Mentioned the bleeding two weeks prior but the Perinatologist didn't seem fazed by it and said to follow up with my OB, which I had been. They just seemed very cut and dry at this appointment, but everything looked great so nothing to worry about.

Up on the 3rd floor at the OB appointment, I told her about my stomach tightening and the pain I have been in lately. She wanted to check me and make sure everything was closed, which it was. That aside, she has a growing concern on my health. Things look great with me so far, but the pain is increasing and I still have 4 children at home to care for. Sure, two of them are at school until 4pm, but the little two are the difficult ones. She said its taking a toll on me having to go up and downstairs putting the baby down for her nap, making breakfast and lunches, lifting the youngest to get her up for diaper changes and so on and so forth. That on top of taking care of the house (which I feel like I slack on anyway, not cleaning nearly as much as I used to and my house just feels dirty. I hate it.) Anyway, back on my thought train, the Doctor wants me to get some help. She asked if any family was around, and nope both our families are back in California. We have lived here for three years without help and I am not used to getting help. She told us that if I do not start getting some help and resting more they will have no choice but to put me in the hospital. That is not something I am ready for, I cannot do that to my family. So, get help it is.

After doing everything myself (with help from my husband) how do you all the sudden ask for help, or be okay receiving help? I feel so weird about this! I hate even asking friends to watch my kids for a few hours, though they tell me all the time they are willing and ready to help out. I'm used to being the one providing the help, not asking for it, and not needing it myself.

Looks like we will be getting some help 3 days a week with someone staying here those days. To me this is too weird. I want to lounge around in my pajamas with my girls and be lazy until we are ready to shower. We still usually end up back in lounging or pajama clothes after showers anyway. With someone here, I would feel the need to be up and dressed properly, showered and not lazy. The exact opposite of what the Doctor is wanting from me. How do I figure this out? My good friend Randi has offered to come help and be put to work. I don't mind being lazy around her, but as far as putting a friend to work in my house, I just wouldn't feel right. This is only for the next few months, I get that, but it is a hard pill to swallow for me at the moment. Will update as things go on. Wish me luck and sanity as I am already feeling antsy and wanting to get out and about. I will do what is best for these babies and my body and stay planted on this couch though... thank God for internet access!

Monday, March 22, 2010

Growing Belly, 20 weeks



Here I am, my 5th pregnancy, carrying triplets at 20 weeks pregnant. Huge difference from the last photo!!

Random Update

Tomorrow is another appointment with the Perinatologist, with level 2 ultrasound then rushing over to the OBs office for a regular appointment. I am 21 weeks pregnant today.

Over the weekend we went to The Woodlands, TX. We were spending the weekend at The Woodlands Resort (very beautiful!) but the gorgeous weather we had the weekend before vanished and it was cold and rainy. So that Saturday we went to The Woodlands Mall to walk around and be out and about. All in all it was a pretty good day, got some new much needed shoes that make walking so much easier! That night my 5 year old son ended up throwing up all over the hotel room bed and floor. We decided it would be best to leave a day early and get him home.

Sunday we went to get a few things at the store, but I just was not feeling right. My belly was pulling, my back was hurting and I opted to go home. Of course mentioning that I was in pain upset David and he kept me on the couch the rest of the day. Once the youngest (21 months) was put down for her nap and the two middle children occupied with a movie, he took off to get groceries with the oldest. I felt awful that doing something as simple as getting groceries for two weeks is now a chore that can't always be accomplished by me, or with me tagging along.

For the rest of the day Sunday I was in a lot of pain, my belly would tighten to the point I couldn't breathe. It didn't really feel like contractions since I know what those feel like so I chalked it up to more stretching. Will obviously be talking to the doctors about this tomorrow and make sure all is well. It hurt to get up off the couch for any reason, and was in tears just getting up to use the bathroom and return to the couch. Not fun! Carrying three babies has definately been interesting to say the least. More updates after the appointments tomorrow...

Weeks 19 & 20

Yes, this post/update is late... Sorry!! Those two weeks were crazy busy for me. Tuesday the 9th, I had another appointment with both the Level 2/ perinatologist and my regular OB. Everything went well, babies are growing and look great, and are weighing approx 11oz each. Yes, they all weighed the same!! The perinatologist said that never happens. So, does this mean I am doing something right??

The very next day late at night I experienced a lot of bleeding and went to the OB first thing in the morning. She checked everything, did ultrasounds and found nothing wrong and the babies to be as perfect as they were on Tuesday. She put me on a few restrictions and sent me on my way.

Week 20 of my triplet pregnancy I turned 29 years old on the 18th of March. Fun stuff. Haha, no really it wasn't an eventful birthday except for calling David home from work to take care of me. I felt bad that I had to do that but was experiencing a lot of belly cramping/ pain and was high and low emotional. So glad he came home!

Wednesday, March 3, 2010

Anxiety

When I am pregnant I tend to get anxiety attacks. Sure, they come time to time when not pregnant but they come a lot more while pregnant. I guess the extra stress or rush of emotions, the changes my body are going through. Who knows exactly, but I try to deal with it. Yesterday was a particularly bad day for me and anxiety.

The day started out pretty crazy being woken by a puking 1 year old at 3am. David woke up and took over since the sight of her puking and heaving was putting me on the verge of losing my own stomach. We stayed up an hour with her and kept her in bed with us. Those of you who have kids know how difficult it is to sleep with wiggly toddler in your bed. Needless to say we didn't get much sleep, a nap was on the agenda for sure.

Nap time rolled around, Peyton went down in her crib, and Baylee fell asleep in my bed. What a shock since Baylee usually doesn't nap (stubborn at 3!). Well, as tired as I was I just couldn't fall asleep right away so I turned on the tv. Nothing was keeping my interest then I turned it to A Baby Story. I watched this show a few times mostly when pregnant with my own. Well this episode was about a woman having her second child, but first ever c-section. She had a huge anxiety/ panic attack once they gave her the spinal block. I have never had a c-section before and seeing her freak out like that was really making me uneasy. I don't know what is going to happen, I'm nervous and I don't want anything to go wrong.

Anxiety was setting in. Big time. Watching the show I was bawling my eyes out, scared of what is going to happen with my own c-section when it comes times to have these triplets. What if the spinal block hurts me? What if something goes wrong? What if I am not properly numb for the surgery and can feel them cutting into me? Every possible "what if" came to mind then and I couldn't stop freaking out, couldn't find a single way to relax. I picked up the phone to text David to which he told me to stop watching shows like that. Gee thanks honey. But then when I fully expressed my anxiety he understood, comforted me and talked me back into a place of calm only he can take me. He offered to come home if I needed him, but I declined and told him I would attempt to take that much needed nap instead.

I don't really know how to deal with the anxiety attacks when they strike, other than rely on David to bring me back to sanity. This one really upset me though and I still don't know whats to come of this c-section. Please keep me (and my sanity) in your thoughts to get through this. I know the babies will do great, I want to be coherent enough to see them when they are delivered though.

Saturday, February 27, 2010

Ummm...

Today was not a good day for me. It wasn't so much aches and pains, though thats how it all started. I wanted to finally get out of the house, go be part of the world... and it didn't happen. During the week, to keep my husband sane I stay home with the girls, because of the shaky spells, random dizzyness and anxiety attacks. The anxiety always strikes while pregnant. No idea why. So I rely on my weekends for getting out of the house and feeling like I am a normal person.

I didn't sleep in today, not because I couldn't, David is amazing at letting me sleep in on weekends when he is home... I just couldn't sleep. Surprise, surprise. I need the sleep and it just doesn't come. Looking at pictures of myself recently I feel like I look like a walking zombie. I definately do not feel attractive, something hard for me to deal with right now. So when I get compliments on how I look, it makes my day, hell it makes my entire week. Its the little things that please pregnant women, or non-pregnant women for that matter.

Headache from hell attacked me today. I haven't had a headache like that in who knows how long and I sure hope another one doesn't plan on visiting me anytime soon! I spent most of the day lounging on the couch with my amazing husband taking care of the kids, cleaning outside and the cars. Right now I am upstairs with the kiddos while they watch movies so Daddy can be in the garage with his buddies for much deserved guys night of poker. That man deserves that and so much more.

There are months to go in this pregnancy and already things as simple as walking up the stairs leave me a bit winded. It makes me feel like a wimp. Really, who is out of breath walking up the stairs of their own home? Ugh. And here I am whining again... I detest whining.

Tomorrow will be a better day... I hope.

Friday, February 26, 2010

Pain

It started last night... we were waiting on David to get home from work when I heard a loud crash and Peyton (youngest) crying in the toy area. I threw off my blanket and tossed my book aside to run to her. Somehow she managed to get this toy sorter 4 tier bucket system to topple over on her, and all the buckets had fallen all over her (yes, we need to anchor it). The stand was sideways wedged between the wall and the cabinet so I had to pull and tug a it to get it and my baby girl free. Thankfully she wasn't hurt, she was still crying from being scared by it though so I swooped her up to cuddle her for a bit.

Those 5 minutes of actions led to a night full of pain. Back pain, stomach pain. You name it, and it most likely was hurting. It wasn't my fault, and it wasn't Peyton's fault for the pain, it was just an accident. I realize now though, I really can not move the same as I did with one at all. There is no room for accidents right now and many things bring pain.

This morning I found it hard to wake up. My back was still sore and the muscles just felt like they were being rung out like wet rags. But, the kids needed to be up and get ready for school, fed, and so on and so forth. Forcing myself out of bed I realized my stomach had this shooting pain up the side of it. I ended up laying back down for a few minutes and it calmed down. I guess I really did strain myself last night. Nothing seems wrong though, and going to the doctor won't solve anything. Muscle pain is what it is, and everything else is chalked up to stretching. They told me this time wouldn't be nice and easy stretching and growing like one (that was easy??) but rather feel rapid and at times violent. Nice.

I think the couch and I will be best friends through the remainder of this pregnancy. Half way there...

Wednesday, February 24, 2010

Resting

At yesterdays Perinatologist appointment the doctor saw and pointed out an old bleed inside. She said at this point, its not bleeding and is okay but its like a bruise would be. The placenta is attached, but has pulled slightly from that area as the bruise will not allow it to attach there. In her words I need rest and to stop being super mom. Not so easy, but I will do my best.

Tonight I found myself getting easily frustrated at the slightest of things which quickly turned from frustration to crying over nothing. Fun, right? My poor husband. He is such a good man. Since I already had dinner started for the kids (I was in another not wanting to eat mood), he sent me upstairs to rest in bed. He evem set up a computer up here so along with a tv, I am all set.

Its hard to eat lately. I can't force myself to eat. If something doesn't look good, or I don't have an appetite I just can't eat. David doesn't like that answer though. Tonight I was content having water and canteloupe for dinner. That didn't satisfy him. So here I sit with a plate of tacos in front of me that smell delicious and I am hesitating. I have got to eat, I know that. It's just not easy right now. Aside from not wanting things, or just looking at something and it making me gag, the babies are pushing on my belly making me full with just a few bites down. The triplets are all great weights, and all their stats look great so I don't see the big deal. Guess I will just have to keep those protein drinks on hand if this continues. Those really aren't so bad and are easier than eating half the time.

I'm healthy, and they are healthy and that's what matters right now. I will rest as much as anyone tells me to so that I can avoid bedrest for as long as possible.

Growing Belly



This is to keep track of the growing belly. I should have started sooner, but oh well :)




Here I am at 5 months, 17 weeks, taken yesterday 2/23/2010









2nd picture is the first I took, at 4 months

How this all started...

I bet a lot of you are wondering what went through my head to become a surrogate. Well... lots, really. Infertility is something that is very close to me (because of people who are close to me who unfortunately suffer from it), and I like to help when I can. My husband and I have four wonderful children together, and the more I looked at them, I knew I wanted to try to give that gift to a couple who couldn't conceive.

In the begining I wasn't quite sure where to start, and spent many hours (yay for nap time!) searching google for surrogacy related articles. I found a local Houston surrogacy agency and wrote to them for more information. They asked that I fill out their forms to request information, and then without sending any, denied me for weight. Really? All I wanted was information. Sure, I was still a bit overweight from having my 4th child just a few months earlier, and it sent a blow and bad feeling. Discouraged, I walked away from the idea for a few months.

The desire to help just never went away, and I returned to my search. I found a new agency that was more than willing to provide information and talk with me about the process. Extraordinary Conceptions, based in Southern California, is the agency I chose to work with. They staff friendly people and are easy to work with. The paperwork was easy to fill out, as well as the applications and soon enough I found myself as a searchable surrogate on their website. It took only 4 months to be matched with the Intended Parents I am now carrying triplets for.

Everything just seemed meant to be from the start of meeting them. I really don't know another way to put it. I've always believed everything happens for a reason, and we were brought together for a reason.

The screening process, matching process, medications, injections, many invasive ultrasounds to measure how things were coming along finally brought us to San Diego, California for the transfer in mid November. The doctor transferred two healthy looking 5 day old embryos and sent me home for 3 days strict bedrest. No walking around, no getting up, no showering, no bending, nothing other than getting up to use the bathroom for three whole days. It felt like an eternity and I was so grateful for that warm shower on the third day!

Back down to San Diego the day I was let off bedrest for bloodwork and to spend the day down at the beach before having to return home to Houston. (Side Note: Southern California is my home... where I was raised, Houston, is temporary haha).

I knew I was pregnant right away. I craved spicy and meat and had to have Mexican food. Gladly my husband indulged and we ate Colimas in Oceanside twice on that visit - best carne asada burritos on earth, hands down! I drank spicy V8 juice as a treat and savored it. Still, we had to wait until a doctors blood test a few weeks later to determine if the pregnancy was successful.

At home I was nauseaus, tired and just knew. The 1st beta had numbers in the 6,000's to which the doctors were happy and suspected both embryos took. My 2nd beta doubled just as they wanted. The IPs were on Cloud 9. I was beyond thrilled to have sucessfully gotten pregnant on the first attempt. Still, more injections followed. Two shots in the rear on Mondays and Thursdays, every other day was a single shot, along with all the pill form medication. The shots lasted through the entire first trimester and let me tell you it wasn't easy. There were days when I was so sick and ready to throw up I didn't even want to stand up, but knew it had to be done.

Seven weeks pregnant the IPs, myself, and my two youngest children went to the OB to see how things were going. After the initial appointment they decided to do an ultrasound to see how many babies we had. First shot showed two sacs and two babies... fraternal twins! Oh wait... what's that?? One sac had two babies in it! Identical twins! So that day I found myself not pregnant with one or two... but three babies! You should have seen the tears of joy in that room!

Tuesday, February 23, 2010

17w1d - Appointments

Today I am 17w1d pregnant. We started the day very early, having to be out the door by 8am to get to the hospital in time for check in at 8:30am. Thankfully my friend Randi came over to sit with the two older kiddos since it was another 20 minutes until their bus got here. We met the IPs and checked in for the Level 2/ Perinatologist visit. David came along (thank God!) and watched the two younger girls while I went in for the appointments.

Fluid checks look great, still showing the twins are boys and the singleton is a girl. Everything looked great on the triplets, but here's the kicker. The Perinatologist (high risk doctor) told me to "stop being super mom and just lay down and rest. Really?? How on earth is this possible when I have my own 4 children to care for as well as a house to keep clean? I feel bad when David comes home and the house is a disaster, though he says he doesn't care. He says top priority is keeping me safe and rested. Still, I feel guilty when things aren't done. He works hard.

Lots of stretching and growing going on inside me, and it hurts sometimes. The triplets are all laying transverse (sideways) which explains the poking on my sides. So far Ive only gained 8lbs in 5 months and am happy about that. The doctors are happy with everything, and back we go in another two weeks.

Monday, February 22, 2010

Finally!

I was finally able to set up a blog about my adventure. For awhile there I was without a proper working computer, making things a bit difficult. I went through some rough points at the begining of this pregnancy and didn't write everything down, but will try to remember it all and post as much as possible. For now, here are the basics:

My name is Janae, and I am pregnant with triplets. I have four children of my own, and am carrying these triplets as a surrogate. In the begining with my beta numbers so high the doctor suspected twins... come to find out with an ultrasound at 7 weeks there were triplets! Back in November I had two of the IPs embryos transfered, both accepted and one split into identical twins. Everyone was in total shock, my body most of all. At least this explained the awful sickness and lack of energy for the first three months.

We have been seeing the OB and the high risk specialist, the Perinatologist every month but appointments were alternating every two weeks. Since I reached 15 weeks two weeks ago the Perinatologist wants to see me every two weeks for fluid checks on the twins and overall check ups by ultrasound. Tuesday will be a long day having to be at the hospital at 8:30am for the Perinatologist and level 2 ultrasound then hurrying over to my OB appointment at 10am. Hopefully, for once, the OBs office wont be so crowded and we wont be sitting around for nearly 3 hours. I sometimes wish I could see my old Dr who had a small office and didn't overload himself with patients. Still, this new Dr is good, just crowded... which does not make for fun times with me bringing two toddlers and being a grouchy, hormonal pregnant woman.

To be continued...